Their weddings are in May 2020.
Midtown Manhattan during rush hour last Friday. Photo via @BrianStelter
A Splendid Note from Liene:
I’ve been fortunate to have worked with wedding pros from 94 countries over my career and I’ve heard from a ton of them this past month – all with similar questions, stories of lost business, uncertainties of what to say to clients who are completely stressed.
We’re all in this together. If you have questions on Coronavirus and your wedding business, feel free to email me at hello@thinksplendid.com.
I’ll be sharing my answers here on the Think Splendid blog so that everyone can benefit. I’ll also keep your name anonymous. Totally free, no strings attached – I truly do not care if you never hire me.
Focus on the Splendid
We're an industry that makes our living by celebrating life's milestones, so I'm going to start each of these update posts with a few positive COVID-19 things we can all smile about:
TOTAL GLOBAL RECOVERIES
The number of global recoveries is now more than 301,000 people, up from 285,000 yesterday.
A Free Quarantine Gift from Gucci
From Hypebeast: “Yuko Higuchi is an acclaimed children’s book author and illustrator from Tokyo. Higuchi is widely-recognized for her fantastical illustrations that portray anthropomorphic animals (especially cats) and nature-inspired motifs. She was recently commissioned by Gucci to translate her surrealistic designs on a collection of shoes, bags, and ready-to-wear apparel for the label’s Children’s Cruise 2020 collection.
Included in the kids’ collection is a digital sketchbook that includes coloring pages, games, and more. It’s free to download now on Gucci’s website.”
This question is from a floral and event designer in the United States
I have a problem and I'm not sure what to do about it. I am an event florist and designer in the Tri-State area and I have two clients getting married at the end of May who refuse to move their dates out of hopes that things will get better.
My husband says I should stop worrying about it, everything will still be shut down, but what if it isn't?
I don't want to do the weddings. It totally freaks me out having to go out in this and they are both large, very involved weddings that require me to be onsite to flip the ceremony to the reception.
One of the brides won't even get her dress until mid May and she has to go into NYC to get it. I really can't wrap my brain around how they could still be considering having the wedding. I mean what if she gets it when she gets her dress? I would never want to put anyone, let alone my family and friends, in harms way like that.
Neither will listen to reason and I've even pointed out if things open up, they move forward with the order, but then things shut down again, they will lose that money. The floral wholesalers have changed their cancellation policies and no longer allow for cancellations.
Technically, I could return their retainers if I actually had the money to return but that money has been spent and there is nothing coming in right now. I'm at a loss and it's totally stressing me out.
I've since updated my force majeure via my lawyer’s input, but nothing in my past contract really covers me in this instance and it never occurred to me that I'd want to cancel on someone.
I want to work and I need the money, but at what cost? To me it isn't worth the risk for me, my family, or my staff. I find these clients and their decision to dig in their heels to be selfish and entitled.
Any insight or advice would be much appreciated.
Answer from Liene
You are justified in feeling that your clients are being selfish and entitled in refusing to cancel or postpone their May 2020 weddings, especially given where you are located.
Yes, we should remain optimistic and hopeful, but authentic optimism doesn’t allow us to stick our heads in the sand and selectively ignore whichever facts we don’t like.
Yes, weddings are an emotional lifestage event even in the best of times, but that does not give engaged couples the right to literally risk the lives of others so that they can have their dream wedding on the exact date they wanted in the midst of a global pandemic.
None of us are getting exactly what we want right now and we may not love it, but we’re reframing our mindsets and doing our best to respond to this pandemic by choosing to be better instead of bitter. It’s called being an adult.
The snarky side of me says you should just send your stubborn brides and grooms this slide from one of New York Governor Cuomo’s signature (and now meme-able) briefing powerpoints:
via @NYGovCuomo
Since asking clients, “Are you out of your effing mind?” is frowned upon, here are my thoughts on how you can best handle this in a professional manner:
1) I agree with your husband that things will very likely still be closed at the end of May. Especially given that you are near New York, I would be surprised if wedding venues will be open and legally allowed to hold events in six weeks.
I know you are still worried, but whatever practical steps you can take to lessen your automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) during this time will go a long way in helping you manage your stress.
Managing your stress as best you can will be key in making clear-eyed decisions going forward. Easier said than done, I know.
2) The COVID-19 death rate in NYC is currently one person every three minutes. It is a horrifying number and includes family members of our New York-based wedding industry colleagues.
I’m not sharing these numbers to depress you, I’m sharing them because your clients need to truly understand the scope of the situation we’re in.
While a lot can happen in six weeks to turn things for the better, it is unrealistic to think we will be in a position to gather safely by then.
Government officials at the state level as well as medical and scientific experts are not only trying to put policies in place to mitigate the spread and to help those who are infected recover, they are also trying to prevent the chance of the virus rebounding.
Countries that did not quarantine for long enough are now seeing a second wave of Coronavirus spread, and I just cannot see the governor of New York and the leaders of the states bordering it allowing that to happen in their regions if they can avoid it.
3) I would wait out your clients as long as you can. I also recommend setting a "no go" date for yourself as to when you will cancel your company’s involvement if they are still digging their heels in and if the cities their weddings are in have decided to lift the ban on public gatherings.
Unfortunately, if the weddings are legally allowed to happen in May but you decide to not take the health risk of being involved, you will very likely need to provide a refund.
4) I recommend checking with your business liability insurance provider (not the clients’ wedding insurance) to see what events they define as “impossible” to fulfill. Depending on their terms, you may only have to refund the amount you have not yet earned and they may cover that refund for you.
The majority of insurance companies in the United States are not paying anything out related to COVID-19, but it’s still worth checking to see if they will. All they can say is no or hell no.
5) If you do need to give a refund for cancelling, I recommend creating a payment plan for yourself so that you do not have to issue the refund in one lump sum.
I double checked, and yes, in many places you do actually have the option to do this (if your contract had outlined different terms, it would be another story).
You are required to set a plan that is fair to your clients. For example, you can’t take 5 years (60 months) to refund a $1500 retainer because you’ve decided you’re only going to repay $25 a month. That would be considered unreasonable.
Send your clients a refund schedule with the dates and amounts you’ll be repaying their retainers and the final date by which the entire amount will be refunded.
This is a tough situation, and I’m sorry your clients are putting you in it. In the unlikely event that these weddings are legally allowed to take place in six weeks, your decision to be involved is ultimately yours to make. Trust your gut.
If you choose to cancel your company’s involvement, do not allow yourself to feel guilty because you decided to not risk your own life nor the lives of your team members in order to make one weekend of someone else’s life special.
*This is not legal advice and should not be construed as such. Remember that laws and regulations vary by city/county/state/province/country. While I’ve run my answers by a lawyer, they are not YOUR lawyer. Always check with your own attorney for legal advice on your specific situation.
Questions from Wedding Pros
When I say we’re all in this together, I mean we are all in this together. I am not a blogger, I am a business consultant and speaker. This blog is not sponsored nor ad supported and is not how I make my income. Since we are all in this together, I am not charging consulting fees to answer questions related to COVID-19.
I will continue answering Coronavirus-related wedding business questions from ANY wedding, event, or hospitality professional, located anywhere in the world, here on the blog over the next few weeks and possibly longer, so that anyone, anywhere in the world can access the information they may need for their business at any time.
I’ll be continuing to work through the questions sent in so far here on the blog so that we can all navigate this together as best we can. Please send any questions you have to hello@thinksplendid.com and remember there is no such thing as a dumb question.
I’ll be keeping the names anonymous so you don’t have to worry about being attached to a question in a Google search or in case you don’t want a colleague or competitor to know what’s on your mind.
Written by
LIENE STEVENS
Liene Stevens, the founder and CEO of Think Splendid, is an author, speaker, and award-winning business strategist. Armed with $2000, a healthy work ethic, and an undeserved dose of privilege, Liene bootstrapped Think Splendid from a scribble in a notebook to a successful wedding business consulting firm with a client list spanning 94 countries.
